Self-Entitlement
I have known, and still know, a number of people who have such a sense of entitlement. Some healthy and some, well, not so healthy. I struggle with this. I always have. How can a person just automatically think they should have anything they want anytime they want it? Does it mean that just because you want it you should have it? What if it means someone else may have to do without in order for you to have it? These exact thoughts are why I have never felt I was entitled to anything other than common courtesy that I afford everyone else. I am beginning to question this, though.
There are those I have known, and now choose to remove myself from them, that will have what they want regardless of the expense of others. They will pursue their dreams and desires regardless of the cost to their children, harm to others or consequences and it’s all justified with the thought that it’s their due. Some have even said, “You do what you have to do to get what you want.” Really? Huh.
There are those that make no qualms about expecting things their way or things they want that don’t go out of their way to hurt or take advantage of others. If they want it, they’ll get it, but not to the detriment of others. When asked why they must have everything their way, they will calmly reply, “Why shouldn’t I have what I want?” Hmmmm. Got a point there.
There are those that dream of having what they want but would never pursue it if there’s any possibility of it harming another in any way or fashion. These are usually the same people who, deep down, wonder why they’re not “worthy” of having what they want. I believe I fall into this category. As mentioned before, though, in the past few years, I have begun asking myself why I don’t deserve certain things in life. Why wouldn’t I deserve to have my birthday remembered? Why wouldn’t I deserve to have my food delivered to me the way I ordered it? Why don’t I deserve success if I work for it? These are just the tip of the iceberg. I don’t believe the things I’m asking for are too much, dammit!
Yes, this can all be blamed on parenting, economic status, etc. Maybe that is it. However, I don’t want to spend my life blaming my parents, financial hardships and former spouse for all of my issues. There comes a time when I must look in the mirror and take care of the task at hand. (This is a topic for a future blog, by the way.) I believe it’s time to get the Windex out and get to work.
I would like to find a way to ease into the second person described but am hesitant to do so because there’s that whole idea that I may get greedy and turn into the person described in the first scenario. Therefore, I say in the third category. It’s a vicious cycle that causes much inner turmoil. All I know is this, I cannot bring myself to being responsible for another person’s discomfort, demise, sadness, pain, anguish or poverty. It’s not in my nature. When I discover I have caused this in another, it weighs heavily on me and I instantly have to try and do something to make it better. I almost always end up making the situation worse. Gees!
For those that have a destructive sense of self-entitlement, SHAME ON YOU! For those that have this healthy sense of self-entitlement, I envy you. For those like me, let’s just keep trying, huh?
